Never try too hard to make people like you. In fact, it doesn’t matter if people like you or not. Be your best self and you’ll attract the best people for you.
The key to being your best self is passion. If you aren’t excited to do something, why should be people be excited to be around you? We’re drawn to people make a life. We tolerate those content to simply live.
I was thinking of the commonalities between my favorite activities. I box professionally, I’m a physics student. I write. I enjoy chess. These tasks are different in terms of their physical execution, but I but feel that the mental processes are similar. I began to list what I felt were the most important mental abilities for success in these fields.
While making the list, I realized that these mental skills are required for achievement in all fields. Developing these traits is the mental equivalent of becoming a better athlete. It’s still possible to be a great football player without great athleticism, but it’s easier if you have it. On the flip side, one can do well in any number of sports with only great athleticism and no specific training.
For those of you who don’t know, I grew up in the ghetto. In the ghetto, there are crackheads. In case you don’t know, crackheads are people addicted to crack-cocaine. Crackheads and the ghetto go together like Kool-Aid and fried chicken.
These crackheads get their crack from somewhere. That’s where crack dealers come in. A natural consequence of growing up in the projects is that I spent a lot of time of dealers and addicts. However, my experience had a unique feature that most people will never be familiar with.
When you debate to learn, you're going to do 3 things that piss most (i.e. average) people off.
You'll be "right" most of the time. At the very least, your reasoning will be more easily defended with objective facts rather than subjective opinions. This is the result of learning and readily casting off erroneous thoughts in favor of more sound ideas.
It’s all starts with a decision. Not wish. Not a hope. Not even a plan. The first thing you have to do is decide that you want something different. Until then, no advice in the world can help you.
I’ve never met someone that wants to make a change in their life that hasn’t. Whenever you meet someone who says that they “want to make a change”, you know that you’re dealing with a charlatan.